The D Word

Well, it happened.  It actually happened.  My daughter has been asked out on her first date.  The D word.  I’ve blissfully avoided it for fifteen years, and now, there it is.  My. Daughter. Is. Going. On. A. Date.

It’s just as friends, she assures me.  And I’m certain that’s how she’s viewing it. Now.  But I don’t think he sees it that way.  No proof, just intuition.  To top it off, I’ve never even met the kid.  I do know that he’s a black belt at the same karate studio she attends, and that he goes to a different school.  Great.  One reason I love her taking martial arts is so she can smackdown any guy who crosses the line with her... and he’s a flippin’ black belt. 

Sigh.

So the conversation goes like this:

She:  I just got asked to the homecoming dance. But not my school’s homecoming dance.

Me:   Who asked you?

She:  Casey

Me:  The guy from karate?  Do you want to go?

She:  I don’t know.  I guess.  It’s just as friends.

Me:  It’s fine with me, just let me know.

She leaves, and I’m left staring slack-jawed at my equally slack-jawed husband.  What just happened here?  Is this a…  a DATE?

Before we could process anything, she comes back in and says she told him yes.  Then she says she told him since she doesn’t want it to be any trouble for him, that I could just drop her off at the school.

Excusemewhat?

Now I am drop-jawed and saucer-eyed as I whip my head to meet my husband’s blank gaze.  Did he not just hear her or has it not registered… Drop her OFF?

So I say, quite calmly,  Ummmmm, I’m not sure how things are done these days, but dropping you off at a strange school to go to a dance with a boy we’ve never met is not the way it’s going to happen.

She goes into teenage-girl-defensive-mode.  I know she really was thinking ‘it’s no big deal.  I don’t want to inconvenience him.’ And I can’t blame her for suggesting this.  She’s a foreigner in the strange land of dating; she doesn’t know the rules and customs.  And it’s been exactly 30 years since I’ve been to a homecoming dance.  Maybe my passport to the teen dating world has expired.

Nevertheless, I reach into my motherly “Talk to your kids so they’ll see it your way” bag of tricks.  I make light of the subject by telling her that it’s her first date.  I’ll need photos, just like I did to all the other formal events she’s attended… with her girlfriends!

She acquiesces, but I still don’t have all the details yet.  All I know is that the evening is becoming more date-like, because now it involves dinner beforehand.  Just friends.  Mmmmmhmmmm Casey… I’m on to you.  The good thing is that they’re going with another couple; thank you God for small blessings.

So how this is all going to play out in the end, I don’t know.  I’m still letting it sink in. A date.  Date.  And I know she’s not interested in him other than as a friend.  Now.  Because she asked if she could back out of it.  This request was followed by a teen-loving lecture about keeping your word.  She’s also mentioned that “he’s soooo awkward!”  Yes he is sweetie.  They all are at fifteen.

It’s been entirely too long since I’ve taken the time to write about my kids.  But with what lies ahead next weekend, I feel another blog comin' on...